I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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