I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you would pick up someone in the library
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
