If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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