The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Randomize