Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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