Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
