I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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