How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Someone shattered a urinal.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
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