I'm jealous of your bromance
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
