Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
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Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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