Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
