doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize