Already got asked if we're dating
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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