we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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