Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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