The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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