You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Randomize
