Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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