McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
