she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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