I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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