we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
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