How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
being pregnant is like rehab
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
