you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
