We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
