So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
