i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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