after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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