pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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