Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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