Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize