I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
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Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
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i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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