carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
