It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
