I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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