I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
