I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
