Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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