It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
