just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize