just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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