I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
vagina is talking i cant
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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