So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
