Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
