so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
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