I heard we made out
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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