No, you can still breathe under the balls.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
