I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
