the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
He has the fingertips of a God
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