I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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