she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
It's never too late to be topless.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
