ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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