I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize